Moving!

I hate moving, where does all this stuff come from? I swear if there is one more thing.. oh wait, there's more.  What is this?  Why did I keep that?  Who in the world spent money on this?  Yet, I can't believe I'm the only one with it.

I don't understand.

The directions are only one man's opinion!

Business Time

I haven't been able to post much lately but this is too good not to spread around the entire world.



Thanks Ron.

This Should Never Happen

This ref should be fired.  Then he should be drawn and quartered.  This happened last weekend (October 18th) between So. Carolina and LSU (yep, the SEC). 

Should he get a jail cell next to Tim Donaghy? You be the judge.  

The Power of Tortilla

Tortillas are the greatest thing to come from south of the border.  

I use them all the time.  Not just for mexican food either.  I'm pretty sure you could make a PB & J in a tortilla.  All the benefits of bread without having to cut off the crust for the kids.  Whenever you eat bread with a meal, instead put your meal in a tortilla.  It might as well be referred to as "The Plateless Meal."  No dinner time dishes, if only I could cook product on the stove in a tortilla.  At the local watering hole, they offer a burger in a tortilla (a burger wrap , if you will).  I have taken it to the next step.  The glory of a chili burger without the mess on your shirt.  I'm telling you there's nothing you can't do.  I might put my entire Thanksgiving Dinner in a tortilla next month.  I bet I could do a restaurant serving everything in one.  Spaghetti, pot roast or whatever.  I've done it for years, you can't stop me.

I've spoken my peace..... Ol'e!

Police

I just finished watching Hard Rock Calling (in hi-def....can't beat hi-def). It's a show from time to time on the Mojo channel. It was the festival concert with The Police and Eric Clapton headlining. Every time I see The Police on TeeVee it reminds me how much better they are than most. I just can't come up with a better all time band. Of course I'm biased like everyone else, but I'm allowed. It's what makes me human. If I could find my cassettes I would of course throw in Synchronicity. My favorite from them, but they were all excellent.

Who else is on my list? It is very much dependent on my mood. I'm sure the Red Hot Chili Peppers are in the top 3 along with The Police. That third spot is sacred. I can't just occupy this spot with the flavor of the week and takes much time to consider. I'm thinking it could be Jane's Addiction. If not third they are in the top 10 for sure. The sounds of The Stone Roses are possibly there for third as well.

I stated once early in my blog entries that lists might be, from time to time, an easy entry. I have decided that if I make another list for a blog entry it will be about something tangible. I could pick up my high school chums' book and peruse the back pages to trigger memories of great great bands, but the top 10 should be there. Right there in your brain poking the inner ear for more when there is silence. Songs do that to me but not bands so much. The problem with songs doing that is people and so-called artists can be accidentally thrust into the limelight and make a song you thought was catchy ("Can't Touch This" for example, what the fuck was I thinking. Now sometimes without cause or action I feel the need to shuffle my body across the floor back and forth in a stance that Sumo Wrestlers stand just before wrapping their knuckles on the mat then running at each other and ..... never mind you get the picture.)

I guess what it comes down to is the List.
1. The Police
2. Red Hot Chili Peppers
3. Jane's Addiction
3a. The Stone Roses
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.

Here is where I stand. I will update this after much angst and some trepidation. I will inevitably let myself down on this list. I can't stand it.

By the way, GO RAYS! The hat will be worn tomorrow.

I'm Falling Behind

I have not posted anything in a while, I have have had a change in my life that doesn't allow me to get to the PC as often. I will, however, continue when I can as this should be only a temporary situation sans PC. I will also post when my mood improves.

Greatest Animated line

"Somebody poisoned the water hole!"

Toy Story

9-22-08

Update:

Perhaps I overstated myself with the word "Greatest". I will say, this line makes me laugh every single time I say it (as Woody would have). I'm thinking the alcoholic beverages I was consuming in combination with the PC readily available made me write something a little over the top. Please forgive the grandstanding.

Let Fries Rule.

I proclaim Steak and Shake french fries can not be beat!


At least by any other food chain. I will not throw my fries to the cock fighting ring against some "Ringer from Route 66" that only Ma and Pa Kettle know about.

This post was inspired by my lunch.

A nod to Gregory McDonald

Since I was a young, naive man I have loved the movies Fletch and Fletch Lives. Gregory McDonald has died. He wrote the books that preceded these movies, there was 9 in total in the series. I feel the need to tell a funny tale, Fletch Lives got me into trouble.

I was in the Air Force from 1988 to 1992. The security police at Cannon Air Force Base ran exercises about every month or two. They practiced making sure they could be ass holes if there was a war. It didn't take much practice, it was a prerequisite before joining, if you have the intelligence of a monkey. Anyway, I only had about three or four weeks before leaving the Air Force. When one entered the flightline, you had to show and display your ID authorizing to you be around the planes. The reason mine wasn't out was you couldn't wear it off the flightline.
I had watched Fletch Lives many times and the night before was one of those times. As I walked through the checkpoint, the Security Police ass bag made the perfect statement. "This is a secure area." I couldn't resist. I looked at the guy I was working with, smiled, and responded with "Well I'm happy for it, most people live in terrible neighborhoods." and kept on walking. My pal just starts laughing as I get my face slammed into a puddle because the SP's suck and have no sense of humor. What were they going to do, kick me out? I was already on my way out.

This is my story. Here is my homage to Gregory McDonald.



RIP

The First Episode of "Use That Word"

la·ment [luh-ment] 
–verb (used with object)
1. to feel or express sorrow or regret for: to lament his absence.
2. to mourn for or over.
–verb (used without object)
3. to feel, show, or express grief, sorrow, or regret.
4. to mourn deeply.
–noun
5. an expression of grief or sorrow.
6. a formal expression of sorrow or mourning, esp. in verse or song; an elegy or dirge.
[Origin: 1520–30; (n.) lāmentum plaint; (v.) lāmentārī, deriv. of lāmentum] —Related forms la·ment·er, noun la·ment·ing·ly, adverb —Synonyms 1, 2. bewail, bemoan, deplore. 3, 4. grieve, weep. 5. lamentation, moan. 6. monody, threnody.  (compliments of www.dictionary.com)

This word was used when I was reading an article on Yahoo! sports about the 10th anniversary of "Home Run 63".  The article is a nice reminder of what brought America back to baseball in 1998.  The author likes using many words with many syllables.  Reminds me of my high school days, trying to come up with different words that have a lot of syllables so we could say them quick while rocking our asses to each syllable.  The "buttrock" might as well be famous.  

Which allows me to use the word of the day.  I lament social "buttrocking".  To this day when I come across a word that make me smile, I'll take the moment to reflect.  But gone are the days of immature simplicity.  I don't think any of the people in my "social circle" (which include just a few) would enjoy this simple pleasure.  Then again, maybe everyone does it.  My friends and I should receive an award, maybe a Nobel Prize of some kind.  A VMA wouldn't do it justice,  I would've have to stand next to Brittany Spears. 

Maybe this is a list I could compose, that way everyone could read and "rock", I guess I'll have to think about that.  Lists seem to be a popular thing in the blogging world.  An easy entry I guess. 

This is the last one, I promise.

I won't show another, but this is funny.

More Trunk Monkey

This one is for you Beth

This is great, we all need a "Trunk Monkey".

I've been Invited...

Well here we go, I was up late last night doing research.  I blame my sister.  I am now in a fantasy football league.  This clearly is going to occupy some of my time.  She gets me to join yesterday and my "draft" is today.  How can I prepare?  There is no time to procrastinate then cram.  I'm just not ready to cram without the procrastination.  It's the calm before the storm.  I put everything off before doing whatever it is.  Needless to say I'm uncomfortable.

I guess I could look at this whole situation another way.  I put off joining a league so long that there is no more time to even join this frustration.  The last few weeks of not being in a league was overtly procrastinating.  Rubbish.  One can't procrastinate retroactively. (Damn, I really tried to use "rubbish" and a hyphenated word in the same blog entry.  Retroactively should be hyphenated.)   

Anyway, now my Sunday mornings will be split between "The Sports Reporters" and updating my roster before "the big game" starts.  That does it, I'm not cooking breakfast!

And...

Tropical Storm Fay was not so bad.  All that preparation now has to be taken care of, I hate taking down the shutters more than putting them up.  They're kind of like Christmas lights, if you don't put them back in some sort of order, it'll take forever the next time you need them.

  

Because of the shutters, waking up with no light in the bedroom whatsoever makes it easy to sleep until your back hurts from being horizontal too long (partly because I hate my bed, but my bitches about the "Select Comfort" bed is for another entry).  

I want to know why every tree frog in my neighborhood in unison sound off when the rain and wind pause in a major storm.  

We did loose power for a while, fortunately it was from about 3 am until 8 am.  I noticed we lost power because even in the time of night it's just hot in Florida, especially in south Florida. I did wake up briefly to desperately kick off the covers.  I'm not complaining about the heat, don't get me wrong.   I hate being cold so much, I have relinquished all rights to complain about the heat.  My Grandfather once said he would rather be cold than hot due to the fact you can always put something more on. Thank whoever you thank that I was not around when he was really, really hot.  I told myself long ago, when I have the ability, I will never shovel snow on my own property.  I have veered off topic, my apologies.

The storm now heads out of town, like a drifter after eating that last piece of apple pie in the diner on the one night you would love that slice.  I'm that person behind the counter at midnight cleaning up the mess from that flaky goodness that got all over.  I'm drying off the exact change he paid with from the leftover condensation of the glass of ice water he requested to wash down his  small piece of heaven.  There is no tip, just the stale smell of a man who hasn't showered all month long (I'm not a pie eater, just the first metaphor that came to mind).

The Weekend

It's time to batten down the hatches!  Looks like Tropical Storm Fay will run right over me. Instead of using small strips of wood to cover joints in building ships, I'll be using the corrugated aluminium that was made to cover the windows of my humble abode.  I hope it doesn't hurt too bad.  

On another note, the Olympics are pretty good this year.  Although the women's marathon is doing nothing for me and the best hope for the USA just dropped out.  Well maybe it's just OK, I can't come up with anything else to write about (everyone is writing about the swimmer).    

I'll let you know how we fare.

If we were Taking Bets...

who would win?

The Duckbilled Platypus 

 

  or The Pelican?

It could be a battle to the death, or maybe a talent contest.  I'm open for any suggestions.

By the way, this entry begins my archive.  I'm a blogger.  

That Damn White Ball

Well, I ruined a nice day outside chasing a ball.  I do like to play golf, I just don't get to go very often.  Last time I played was last October, so naturally I didn't hit the ball very well very often.  The thing about golf is if you do well for a hole or two it's enough to make you endure another round another time.  So I will play again, I hope it's not another year before I do either.

The Olympics are on, how to those girls stay on that balance beam?  She bounces, flips and lands on this 4 inch wide beam.  How about that China man stabbing an American couple and then jumping to his death.  The news say he was upset with a recent divorce and a son whose in trouble.  This American and his wife had nothing to do with you and your problems.  I say, well I say nothing to you.  Coward.

Enjoy the Olympics, it's the only time in the next 4 years we will watch grown men/women throwing a ball into a net while swimming.  The water polo is worse than soccer.  One more thing, is it just me? Am I the only one who can't tell the difference between the men and women swimmers with these new suits they wear?  Just a question for those who read.

As much as....

Whew!  I'm glad I stopped that crap, vomiting from my keyboard.

I'm Not Artsy-Fartsy but This Is Kinda Cool

Thanks for the link Mom.

By the Way...

It's a time for us to take a stand. I don't ever ever want to see the cavemen on TV again. The commercials were funny for a while, the writers strike (I think) thankfully axed a proposed television show with them. Now they just need to go away, no cavemen doing the hustle and accusing me of doing the same. If I hear him mention "jazz hands" again I'll take up gardening.

Oh god, please take off the commercials, I hate dirty fingernails.

It's Time to Buy a Hat

I have been troubling myself. I've started this thing (my blog) and now I'm not sure what to illustrate through words. Maybe describe my day? No, no one really cares. Maybe start a novel involving many characters which cause havoc and others fixing the havoc? I'm pretty sure that my purely random mind (some call it A.D.D.) would never allow such a task to be completed. It would be a book that never ended ( like that song in your head now, "it's the song that never ends, it goes on and on my friends...."). I could talk about..... you get the idea.

I'm thinking of becoming a baseball fan again. I live in Florida and I like (in general) the American League. I came from Michigan, so last year was pulling for (pause to check a fact on ESPN), scratch that, 2 years ago for the Tigers. My Dad is a BoSox fan so last year I was kinda rooting for them. I think that it's time to establish my rooting interest; (drum roll) it's the Rays. GO RAYS! now I have to buy a hat. That's the goal for the day, buy a Rays hat. It doesn't hurt that they are on top of their division. Maybe they can get to the playoffs this year. The Rays do have to hang in there against the Yankees and Red Sox, but as SportsCenter has told me they are up by 3. This does mean I am rooting for a man named Evan Longoria though, I'm not sure how that makes me feel. It's official, I'm off the fence.

My baseball question is as states; if the Tampa Bay Rays are 64-44 why does everyone say they are 20 games over .500? If you really think about it, they are only 10 games over .500. If you were to take 10 games off of their winning total and add those same 10 games to their loss total they would be .500. I just don't get it. Someone, please set me straight.

I know funny, this is funny

This one is for you John, cat lover.

The Evolution

I have deemed it time to write a blog. I didn't think I would ever write a blog, yet here I am writing a blog. Why do people write blogs? I'm not too sure, I signed up to do this mostly to respond to someone who I've come in recent contact with after almost 20 years of time passing. I don't claim to be any kind of writer. Maybe this is how it starts. You email, then you instant message and you stop. I was living in Texas (that's another entry for another time) and my Mom came to visit. One evening I was on ICQ with my sister in Florida. My mother was fascinated. She couldn't believe it was so simple and free. She left my house after a few days and visited my sister. There we were writing to each other again, now she is writing to me from Florida.

My Mom finishes her trek around the country and purchases her first computer. She was compelled to start typing, typing instead of calling, or that was the intent. She buys a computer and we end up on the phone for hours. How does this happen? This doesn't begin the way she thinks it should. "Why can't I find you on my computer Steve?" So, after we download (via modem) the latest version of ICQ, we start. We talk (I mean type). we get my sister to type with us and she types with my sister. The end of ICQ happens after about 3 months.

In ICQ at the time, if you wanted to not be bothered by people who haven't left their home in years, in your profile you would write "for family use only". My mother didn't do this. I get a call from her about 7:00 in the evening. "What did you get me into?" I respond as most people would with, "I'm not sure Mom what happened?" She then goes into this 10 minute rant about a man who popped up on her ICQ asking her to "cyber" and he had his camera pointed at his manhood. I lost it. Laughing as hard as I have ever laughed at the time, my Mom is all but cussing at me. She would never cuss at me. I explained how this could have been avoided in her profile. I'm pretty sure that was the end of chatting with Mom. It didn't last much longer with anyone else for me either.

I'm not one for talking with strangers I can't see and I'm not putting a camera on my PC for others to see me. Give me a phone. I can speak to you and you can speak to me. I can hear what you mean more than just what you say, usually.

I guess I have come full circle. I am writing a blog. It's O.K., this is how we all evolve. We do things that we didn't ever think we would, eventually. Hence the blog. If I should stop with one entry on this blog let me know. If others would like to read more entries about random things I might write about let me know as well. If I hear nothing its O.K. too. I will come up with another topic that people might relate to soon.